Since time immemorial, humankind has celebrated the athlete. There is a primal sense of combat in sport which allows us to release our more aggressive urges vicariously from the comfort of an armchair by cheering for our favorite athletes. We raise our gridiron competitors to divine levels of heroes. The Flash is a runner, Hawk-Eye is an archer, Superman is a high-jumper that can leap tall buildings in a single bound. And, of course, there is the pinnacle of American athleticism: the bowler. With all the grace of a mighty rhinoceros, the bowler charges forward and heaves his burdensome stone toward his tenfold enemies. It is no wonder we entertain ourselves in emulating these champions of the alley. But, as with all imitations, the amateur forgery is weak. Details get lost and minor elements are neglected. Would Batman go into battle without buckling his utility belt? Would Frozone duel without donning his Super Suit? Then why would anyone try to bowl without lubricating the lanes? Join Mat & Veronique as we rent some gumshoes and strike out at Unwaxed Bowling Lanes.
*Grumbles are specifically off-the-cuff, no research went into this grumble.
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